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When Dirty Talk Makes You Wonder…

If you’re anything like me, you are always interested in improving your sex life. No matter how good it is already, there is always something else out there to do…something a little more special, a little kinkier, a little sweeter. Sex is not only a ton of fun, but an ever-changing learning experience.

But from time to time, you might stumble upon a fantasy that makes you question what you really want. You might try out something and decide you like it so much, you want it again…and again…and oh, please, yes, again!

If this does happen to you, it’s important that you don’t let it shake you up. Here’s an example of what I’m talking about:

When my husband and I were dating, I took him to a strip club. I’ve always loved those dark, sexy, naughty places…they are ripe with possibility and I’ve always felt quite comfortable around those women in their twelve-inch stilettos and little else.

I intended the evening to be all about my man, so I was ready to order up a few private lap dances and watch the action unfold. But then he turned the tables and ordered a lap dance for me.

I enjoyed the novelty of it at first. The stripper and I talked and laughed and joked. But then she really got down to business – and what should have been a ten-minute thrill turned into almost thirty minutes of quite a bit of sexy time. She was bumping, gyrating, whispering into my ear…

And oh, my God, it made me hotter than New York asphalt in August.

It wasn’t long after that before women began to creep into my fantasies. My man and I had often indulged in roleplaying in the bedroom, and we were all about vivid fantasies of threesomes, foursomes, and even more-somes, and most of the time those threesomes we imagined included women. But the women were always there for his benefit, not for mine.

Until after that lap dance, that is.

Suddenly, I noticed women who were wearing heels. I appreciated a lovely woman walking down the street in a decidedly different way than I ever had before. I found myself thinking about women, wondering about their bedroom habits…much like I had always done with the men who crossed my path.

Pretty soon, I was wondering about my own orientation. Was I straight? Bi-curious? Bi-sexual?

The cool thing about those questions is this: It all started with some dirty talk in the bedroom, and that dirty talk led us to try out the strip club, in the hopes of getting new ideas for our bedroom romps. In the end, I discovered a new dimension of myself, and our sex life became so much richer, thanks to my questions and willingness to explore. In the end, dirty talk games in the bedroom led to a whole new world.

So the next time your lover mentions something so naughty, so over-the-top, that you are sure it won’t turn you…but then it does…stop and consider why it makes you so hot. Who knows? That dirty talk scenario might have been the push you needed to discover who you really are.

I did say sex was a learning experience, didn’t I?

About Denise Brienne

Confident, fun, well-rounded and sexy. Those are words that describe author Denise Brienne, a thirty-something woman who has a knack for giving the best advice to those who want to spice up their intimate relationships.

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