The actions and subsequent apology of Tiger Woods has cast the world of sex addiction into a worldwide spotlight. The number of mistresses he had is still not clear, but it is certain there were at least a dozen. He wanted sex all the time, and would do whatever it took to get it. He hid his desires extremely well from the public and from his family, and the shock that the public felt when his indiscretions were revealed was nothing compared to the shock and shame felt by his wife.
Sex addicts do not set out with the intention of hurting anyone. Instead, they are looking for something that, for them, is as addictive as any drug. Are you a sex addict? Do you know someone who is? Have you seen any of these signs?
Sex is the only thing that matters. A sex addict will lie, cheat, and steal to get the next fix. Sex becomes the center of the universe and the only thing that matters. They will risk their job, their marriage, their relationships, their financial well-being, and every other good thing in life in order to have sex one more time. They don’t think about the consequences, and even when those consequences do come to pass, they can’t stop.
The pornography is out of control. If you can’t find sex with a partner, you will often turn to porn to scratch the itch. Though porn addiction and sex addiction are not the same thing, they often go hand-in-hand. The constant need for an orgasm drives many sex addicts to look at all types of porn, at all times of day, and many sex addicts will harbor a massive collection.
You find it impossible to be faithful. Many think sex addicts must be lacking something at home, that their bedroom time with their spouse is not so hot. In fact, just the opposite is probably true. Most sex addicts have a wonderful sex life with their partner, but that is not enough to stop or stall their addiction. They will sleep around as often as they can, not because they don’t love their partners or want to commit, but simply because they can’t.
Your schedule revolves around it. You spend a great deal of time just trying to figure out when you will have your next orgasm. You plan lunch dates, dinner dates, morning phone sex sessions, and anything in between. You will cancel meetings, take serious risks in getting caught, and form elaborate plans just to get a quickie.
Not having sex feels like withdrawal. If you don’t have sex for a while, you feel lost. The craving is intense, like that of a drug addict trying to kick the habit. You fall into a deep depression and feel as though you cannot function without your fix. Your life becomes miserable, but when you go back to having frequent sex, you feel just as bad, if not worse. It becomes a vicious cycle that can’t be broken without serious help.