When you are thinking in terms of romantic dates, having sex on the first date might not be on the menu. But sometimes, a couple hits it off so well that the logical conclusion of the date is a little roll in the hay. If you and your date seem to be leaning in that direction, there are a few things to remember:
Sleeping with someone you have just met or just begun seriously dating can easily backfire. Having sex on the first date sets a precedent for the dates that come after that, one that cannot easily be reversed. They will expect to have sex again on the next date, and the next, and the next — and then you might find yourself as “friends with benefits” instead of the romantic couple you had hoped to be.
Besides that, sex on the first date is rushing things a bit. If you’re a true romantic, taking things slow is in your best interest. It allows you to get to know each other without any pressure of sexual activity, and that will bode very well for you in the future if you do choose to just be friends — if you haven’t had sex, you probably won’t have any regrets.
But if you do choose to have sex on the first date, you can still take it slow. Don’t whip out the dirty talk or the naughtiest moves during that first time. Always use protection, always be receptive to what your lover wants, and don’t pressure them for anything that they don’t want to give.
If you do have sex on the first date and then wake up the next morning feeling guilty about what you’ve done, your best bet is to start talking. You don’t have to tell your lover you feel guilty until you’ve gauged their reaction to what happened. If they seem ashamed of themselves, a simple “This is awkward, isn’t it?” is a good way to break the ice and coax a smile. Then you can wrap yourself in sheets, sit up in bed, talk about what happened, and decide together whether or not it was a good idea.
Choosing to have sex on the first date might not be the smartest move, but that doesn’t mean the romance is gone. You can still have the same romantic anticipation that you were building from the start — it will just be moving a bit faster than you had planned.
Only you and your lover can decide if this is a good thing, but if you’re both that attracted to each other, it is probably a good sign for a long-term relationship.