So you know you like your dirty talk. You might even have a few ideas up your sleeve for the next hearty romp you have with your partner. But consider this: How LOUD is your dirty talk?
Recently, a woman in Britain was banned from “making excessive noise” anywhere in the country. The reason? Her sexual sessions were so loud that the neighbors could hear them. In fact, the screaming was such that even through walls, closed windows and doors, and the space between houses, this woman could be heard as clear as a bell.
Has your sexual noise ever landed you in hot water? Here are a few tips for keeping it down – or for making an excuse if you simply can’t do it!
Gag it. If you’re into BDSM even in the slightest, consider a ball gag to keep you quiet while your partner is giving you what you love. Not into that? Use a blindfold as a gag, or simply ask your partner to put their hand over your mouth when you start to yell. Either way, it’s hot — and it muffles the sound.
Make it a game. How quiet can you be? Can you come without a sound? Can you show your partner what you want with nothing more than a whisper? Turn your sexual noise into a sexual game, and give your neighbors at least a few nights of quiet time.
Soundproof the house. Consider soundproof insulation, soundproof windows, and even exterior soundproofing, such as you find in recording studios. If you can’t stop making the noise, at least you can keep it inside, where only you and your partner can enjoy it!
Examine your motivations. Why are you making so much noise? Do you want the neighbors to hear? Does the thought of them hearing you get you off? If you’re doing it to feed the exhibitionist side of you, perhaps you could do something a bit more revealing yet a bit quieter. Consider filming your own amateur porn or if you are the braver soul, invite your neighbors to join in!
Try something different. If the noise you make during sex is simply to help you get into the act, you might want to try something different in bed. Something crazy, something far “out there,” something that will make you go silent in awe rather than screaming in ecstasy. What a good excuse to try out new things, don’t you think?