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Men, Gather Round – A Quick Dirty Talk Primer

Men, we get it – you are often at a loss when it comes to talking dirty to women. You’ve been taught to respect your feminine counterparts, and sometimes the thought of talking dirty to the woman you love (or lust after) can strike fear into your respectful heart! What if you say something in the heat of passion that doesn’t set well with her? What if you reveal yourself to have kinky fantasies that you are sure will push her away?

Most of all, what if you call her a name in the heat of passion, one that she might not enjoy? What if you call her a bitch…or, God forbid, a whore?

Never fear. Ladies can handle more than you might think, but just to be on the safe side, here is a primer for approaching that first-time dirty talk moment.

Keep it in the bedroom. Don’t start the hardcore dirty talk until you are in the bedroom. There is a very good reason for this! The first time you are exploring dirty talk with that special new woman, you want her to understand that your comments to her are meant for playtime…and that you don’t really consider her a bitch, a whore, a slut, or whatever the case may be.

Later, you can take it elsewhere, and explore the thrills of naughty talk in public…but for now, keep it simple and private.

Start out slow. Don’t jump into the hardcore dirty talk at first. You have to read her cues and watch her reactions to understand exactly what she wants, and how far might be too far. She will definitely let you know! For the first time, steer clear of words that might bother her, such as calling her a “cunt.” Many women might like that word, but those who don’t like it have a serious aversion to it.

Start with softcore phrases. “I’ve wanted to be inside you all day” is a good one, and so is “I’ve been wondering what you taste like.” You can throw in naughtier words here and there, and if she goes off on a dirty talk spree, feel free to follow right along!

Let her lead. If she’s heading into the dirty talk territory, you know it’s entirely safe to follow. If she says a certain word, you know she’s comfortable hearing it, and you can add it to your list.

Keep the fantasies light. If she wants to hear about your fantasies, don’t tell her the kinky one about three women, a kitchen table, and a quart of motor oil. Save the good stuff for when you know her better. In the beginning, focus on the basic fantasies, and ask to hear hers, too. How far she is willing to go will always be a great guide to tell you how far your own dirty talk can go.

About Denise Brienne

Confident, fun, well-rounded and sexy. Those are words that describe author Denise Brienne, a thirty-something woman who has a knack for giving the best advice to those who want to spice up their intimate relationships.

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