How to Write Dirty Text Messages

So you want to talk dirty to your man, and you’ve got that phone in your hand, just waiting for your first text message. But you don’t know what to do! Sound familiar? You’re not the only one who has wondered what to say in a naughty text message, and you certainly won’t be the last. But there is help with this short primer on how to create dirty text messages:

Rule One: Keep it simple. The beauty of a text message is that it’s short and sweet. That’s the way you want to keep it when you’re in the midst of naughty dirty talk. Keep your text to one or two lines, don’t hesitate to use abbreviations to make typing faster, and as soon as you’re done with one text, send it – don’t wait. The key to a good texting session is to keep them rolling, one after the other, to help paint that naughty picture in your lover’s mind.

Rule Two: Keep it honest. Don’t tell your texting partner that you are game for something if you’re not. In this age of cheaper travel, it’s entirely possible that your text messages could wind up as the backdrop for an in-person liaison. You don’t want to promise something you can’t deliver!

Rule Three: Keep it private. Make certain you are texting the proper person. Many mistakes have been made that so many texting fools wish they could take back! Before you hit “send” take a second look at the person you’re sending it to, just to be certain. After all, “Michael” might be right next to “Mom” in the contact list…and I don’t have to tell you how embarrassing such a mix-up would be.

Rule Four: Get Your Raunch On. Forget flowers and romance. Forget being suave or debonair. If you’re horny enough to text back and forth, you’re horny enough to say what’s on your mind. Let it all hang out! Get as raunchy as you like – the worst that can happen is that you get no response. Get as kinky as you want, and it’s a good bet that your texting partner will follow right along.

Rule Five: Get Your Own! It’s a sad fact of life – when you’re texting with someone you don’t know very well, they might be the kind to “get theirs” and then sign off. The last thing you want is to text someone to a great orgasm and be left with a silent phone when it’s your turn. So while you’re texting, think about the things that turn you on, and get your own pleasure. Tell your texting partner what you’re doing to make it even hotter!


  1. I want to dazzle my guy.

Speak Your Mind