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Dirty Talking In The Kitchen

Have you ever noticed that when couples fall into a sexual rut, they always have sex in the bedroom? They lose the spontaneous and fun-loving attitude it takes to make love on the dining room table, the stairs in the front hallway, or even the backyard.

Sometimes life is to blame – they might have a full house with friends, family, children, and the occasional unexpected visitor. Or they might be too tired to do anything but fall into bed at the end of the day. It’s understandable that sometimes those things happen, but it’s also inevitable that the sexual relationship suffers for it.

One way to regain that spark is to take your dirty talk somewhere other than the confines of the bedroom. Maybe you can’t have sex on the kitchen table, but who’s to say the foreplay can’t start there?

Begin by looking at everything in your kitchen as a sexual object. Spatulas might bring to mind spanking, and so does that nice metal whisk. The honey in the cabinet is perfect for drizzling over your partner’s body, and the cucumber in the bottom crisper might make a nice dildo, if one were so inclined. The juice of that plump orange would look beautiful dripping over your body, wouldn’t it?

Choose foods for dinner that will fire up the libido. Decadent oysters, a dessert with curls of chocolate and pools of sauce, a salad with crisp, moist cucumber on the side. Eat with your fingers in front of your partner – dip your finger into the salad dressing and take your time in licking it off. Suck on the spoon long after the soup is gone. Feed your partner tiny pieces of savory goodness, and be sure to kiss away any delicious drips.

All the while, talk to your partner. Stroke the cucumber before you slice it, and ask your partner if it reminds him of anything. Lick the tomato juice from the spatula and wink at your lover as you do it. Mention that the spatula might make a interesting mark on your ass, if he were so inclined to give it a try later. You can even lean over the kitchen table, give him a saucy grin, and ask him if he might be interested in some dessert of a very special kind when you’re finally alone – right there on that table.

Turn everything into a sexual game! You can do this with other rooms in the house, but the kitchen is the one most conducive to your naughty thoughts. So start planning that special dinner, put on your best sensual side, and let the honey do the talking for you!

About Denise Brienne

Confident, fun, well-rounded and sexy. Those are words that describe author Denise Brienne, a thirty-something woman who has a knack for giving the best advice to those who want to spice up their intimate relationships.

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