Anything goes when talking dirty, right? Dirty talk is all about fantasies, roleplaying, desires, and being non-judgmental. Sure, there are certain words and phrases you might not like, but everyone has their own kinks, right?
But there are a few dirty words that shift all that hot lovemaking from the realm of “Oh, yes!” to “What the hell was that?” So without further ado, here are some of those dirty talk phrases that might be best avoided…unless your kinks are, you know, really kinky:
You like it when Daddy plays with your Vaggy? First, slang terms that make vaginas sound like toys are usually the kind of thing that will make a woman laugh out loud, which doesn’t set the mood. And unless you are in a dominant/submissive relationship where “Daddy” means “Master,” you might be pushing the boundaries a bit with the Daddy reference.
Oooh, look! Your pee-pee has a rashy! If you are into infantile fantasies, have at it…but if you are in a straightforward, simple-kinks relationship, this is the kind of comment that makes us want to head for the hills…or the gynecologist.
Your sex is so moist. This makes you sound so terribly like a historical romance novel, darling, and it doesn’t work to light the fire. Instead of using “sex” try using something a bit raunchier, like pussy…and moist? Well, simply point out how wet she is will do.
Look at that wee adorable peen! Okay, ladies…this one is all for you. If you must call his dick something, make it something manly! Wee means small, adorable brings to mind fuzzy kittens, and “peen” is just…well, peen.
Splooge, boink, potty, etc. Cute and fun words are great if you have known each other for a while and have inside jokes between the two of you…but if you are just getting started, use these words sparingly! Some might laugh you right out of bed, while others might think you were just…well, weird.
Of course, talking dirty with a partner should come with an air of acceptance, and anything that is said should be considered as something blurted in the heat of the moment. After all, when was the last time you carefully measured your words when you were on the cusp of a mind-blowing orgasm?
But if your partner says something that annoys you, pisses you off, frightens you, or otherwise turns your dirty talk experience into a negative rather than a positive, talk to them about it! Don’t stay silent and deal with it. Communication and intimacy can ensure that the words in the above list don’t make it into your dirty talk session…unless, of course, you want them to, you naughty peen!