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Can There Be Too Much Hooking Up?

Back in your mom’s college days — hell, back in MY college days — the term “hooking up” wasn’t born yet. Instead, it was “sleeping around” or “slutting it up” or the ever-interesting “notching.” But as time rolls on and attitudes toward sex open up even more, hooking up has become not only a phrase that you hear thrown about rather often, but a way of getting your kicks without having any sort of hooking up of a different sort.

Mere decades ago, having sex with someone meant you were bound to marry them. End of story. Those who dared to have sex out of wedlock and then chose not to marry the person they slept with were considered damaged goods. In that case, hooking up meant you were a slut who didn’t deserve to ever have a serious relationship. But over time, that ridiculous notion has been sidelined, and thank goodness for that!

Now the pendulum has swung in the other direction – but has it swung too far? In the olden days, having sex meant making a commitment. Over time, fuck buddies and casual flings became acceptable. But now hooking up is something that is often done without a second thought to the possibility of disease, the emotional fallout, or the reputation that might be garnered from it. Hooking up has come to mean sex without consequence, and as such, it is embraced in a way that would be appalling to older generations.

But can there be too much hooking up? Though researchers have found that teenagers and college students who hook up with random partners on a regular basis still have a healthy attitude toward sex, many relationship experts point to potential problems down the road. When the act of sex is seen as a way of finding pleasure rather than a way of finding an emotional connection, there could be problems for those who choose to settle down later in life.

On the other hand, the emotional issues could be with the other person in the relationship – despite how far we have come and how enlightened we are as a society when it comes to sex, jealousy and puritanical values are still alive and well. If someone has an affinity for hooking up but then chooses to spend their life with someone who sees things very different, that discrepancy in values could lead to serious problems.

Beyond the question of whether hooking up makes sex less valuable, there is also the question of safety. If you are inclined to hook up with more than one partner, be sure to use protection, and get tested regularly. Hey, it’s not exactly the sexiest topic, but it’s better safe than sorry!

About Denise Brienne

Confident, fun, well-rounded and sexy. Those are words that describe author Denise Brienne, a thirty-something woman who has a knack for giving the best advice to those who want to spice up their intimate relationships.

One comment

  1. I think safety is the most important factor when it comes to hooking up. If people still have a healthy atitude towards sex than it shouldnt matter. The spread of STDs however is a serious fight and needs to be pushed harder in order to make sure our teens stay safe

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