Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.
How often have you heard that phrase? Sometimes it does seem that men and women are from different planets. Women can try to tell their man something, but it never seems to get through. He seems oblivious! Hints are dropping everywhere and he’s still on the couch watching television. But when you finally explode and tell him what you want – in no uncertain terms! – he blinks innocently and asks, “Well, why didn’t you just say so?”
He’s not being dense. He’s not ignoring you. He’s just acting like a man – he’s acting the way he’s supposed to act.
The disconnect in communication comes from this: Women are subtle. They drop hints and make innuendo. They talk about something with passion, and expect that their man will understand what they want. Women ride on emotion and expect their bodies, their words, and their subtle comments to convey what they want to say.
Men, on the other hand, are logical thinkers. They are not subtle. Men will be happy to give you what you want – in fact, they will bend over backward to do anything you desire! – but they have to be told what it is. They don’t easily read subtle hints, and they don’t claim to be able to do so. It’s just the way they are wired, and logical minds don’t soak up subtle hints.
How do you bridge that communications gap?
Give your man what he needs to understand you. In other words, drop the subtle hints. Drop the little suggestions and the comments designed to get through to him. Tell him what you want – just flat-out make it clear.
If you want sex, let him know. Wearing your tightest jeans and making comments about giving head might not get his attention, but you can damn well bet a sexy negligee will. Lighting candles in the room might not make an impression, but if you are playing with the candle wax, your intentions just might get through. Playing soft music might not make him jump at the idea of going to bed, but whispering that you would like to make love to the beat will get his mind headed to the bedroom in a hurry.
Once you’ve made it clear what you want, you can start working on the subtle hints. Tell him you love those tight jeans – that wearing them always makes you think about sex. Explain that when you’re in the mood, you might light a candle instead of turning on the bedside lamp.
Get his attention – then coach him to see your subtle hints. He will be glad to know what you want, and you won’t be frustrated with trying to explain it to him. It’s a win-win situation!