Dirty talk can open the doors to a great new time in your relationship. It can give you a whole new world to explore, open up the lines of communication between you and your partner, and give you plenty of good fantasy fodder to expand upon when you and your lover are ready to add even more spice to your good times.
But some dirty talk can be a major tip-off that something is wrong. Sometimes lovers reveal things in the heat of passion that lets you know where there thoughts — or where their heart — really are at that moment. These dirty talk tips might not be what you want to hear, but they are definitely good to be aware of, in the event that it does happen to you.
The vocal lover suddenly becomes shy. If your lover has always enjoyed dirty talk but suddenly goes silent in bed, it’s worth asking why. It’s entirely possible that a shy lover will suddenly come out of their shell, but it’s a very rare thing for a dirty-talking pro to keep their mouth shut. In that case, either you are in the doghouse in a serious way, or something is up that you need to know about.
Those new fantasies are far out of the normal realm. It usually takes time to build up to a new fantasy, especially when it’s something rather taboo or something that goes against your moral character. For instance, if your girlfriend has always been an adamant one-man woman but suddenly starts talking about a threesome with another man, then you might want to pay attention to where the idea came from.
Turn-ons are now turn-offs. In the same vein, things that once turned your lover on now turn them off as effectively as a light switch being flipped. They might use the sudden turn-off as an excuse not to have sex, or to jump into an argument about something that has nothing to do with sex. It isn’t that they are turned off by what you’re saying — it’s that they are looking for a fight, and maybe feeling guilty about what they are doing on the side.
Your lover says someone else’s name. This is definitely the mother of all screw-ups when it comes to dirty talk. If your lover loses themselves in the heat of passion and calls out someone else’s name, it’s time to halt all the action and have a very serious discussion. Granted, sometimes fantasies can take over and you can get carried away — but if that other person’s name pops up in addition to other red flags, you just might have a cheater on your hands.
If you do notice any of the big warning signs, take a deep breath, keep your cool, and start paying close attention to other tip-offs. A cheater can’t hide forever, and sometimes, dirty talk can help you call them out.