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Tips for Long-Distance Dirty Talk

You might know the feeling: your partner is far away, but you are both horny, and you want it now. So you have phone sex, or you hit up cyber and turn on the webcam, but none of it seems to be enough. You want something more than what you are getting through the internet modem and the phone lines.

That’s where the real world and the virtual one collide.

If you and your partner are trying to make a long-distance relationship work, you have to interject something “real” of yourself into the picture. Not just your voice, and not your thoughts sent to your partner online, but a real part of you that they can hold, touch, smell, taste…something that, essentially, makes you are “real” in their eyes as if you were standing right in front of them.

You can make yourself more “real” by offering something from your day-to-day life. Not just pictures on the internet, or a card you might pick up at the store, but something that truly reflects you. Send them a bottle of your perfume, or a tube of your favorite lotion. Send them lingerie that you have worn, or something that is special to you, like a small token that reminds you of a special place. Send them a tin of cookies that you have made in your own kitchen, or a stuffed animal that you have had since you were a child.

That takes care of the romantic and intimate part…now what about the steamy side of your relationship?

Send your partner a vibrator, one that you have tested out a few times. Send them a mold of your private parts. Offer clothing that smells like you, naughty items you have used, or go even further — a man I once knew sent his lover a small vial of his semen, packed in dry ice.

Ask them to send you something of their own, such as an old shirt or pair of panties or boxers. Then when you start the dirty talk over the phone or the computer, you can rest assured that you have something that was close to their body…something that was with them, and is not with YOU. That can make your dirty talk even more “real” and as a result, hotter than ever.

About Denise Brienne

Confident, fun, well-rounded and sexy. Those are words that describe author Denise Brienne, a thirty-something woman who has a knack for giving the best advice to those who want to spice up their intimate relationships.

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  • Tazz032

    I like the way he holds my waist as he digs into my pussy and i wanna scream his name while fuckin, more dirty talk over the phone cos we r in a long distance relationship