101 Ways To Apologize
1. Say it with flowers.
2. Bestow expensive jewelry on her.
3. Tattoo their name on your body.
4. Become their sexual slave.
5. Write it in a sweet, romantic letter.
6. Give her a kitten with “I’m sorry” written on his collar.
7. Apologize with chocolates.
8. Fuck their brains out.
9. Tell them via text message.
10. Let their friends know what you did wrong.
11. Leave a voice mail.
12. Say it on the big screen at the football game.
13. Send an email with all the reasons you are sorry.
14. Hire an escort to fulfill their dreams for an evening.
15. Give them a sexy new toy.
16. Propose marriage.
17. Let her drive your truck for a week.
18. Get down on your knees and grovel.
19. Beg and plead with them to forgive you.
20. Tell them how much they mean to you.
21. Ask what you should do to make it right.
22. Never, ever do that shit again, dude.
23. Give him a puppy to play with.
24. Take them on a romantic getaway.
25. Send an apology via singing telegram.
26. Better yet, sing it yourself.
27. Embarrass yourself in front of their friends while apologizing.
28. Bake a cake and write “I’m sorry” in icing.
29. Paint it on a canvas and hang it on the wall.
30. Make their favorite candlelit dinner.
31. Promise it will never happen again.
32. Cry when you talk about what you’ve done.
33. Apologize to her mother (that will earn bonus points).
34. Put “I’m sorry” post-it notes everywhere.
35. Be very, very good for the rest of your life.
36. Write it on a piece of paper and put it in a heart-shaped box.
37. Give them the one thing they want most in the world to make up for it.
38. Take them on an overnight trip to anywhere they want to go.
39. Leave them alone for a while to sort it all out.
40. Tell their friends how sorry you are.
41. Ask their co-workers to put in a good word for you.
42. Take them out to a surprise lunch to apologize.
43. Let them rave and rant at you for as long as they need to.
44. Explain yourself!
45. Say it with a sky-writing plane.
46. Have it etched on a wine bottle.
47. Spell it out with candles on the front lawn.
48. Write it in the sand at the beach.
49. Send them a gift basket with an “I’m sorry” card.
50. Give them a small vial of your tears.
51. Give them a star through the star registry that is titled “My Apology.”
52. Give her a diamond necklace.
53. Give him a watch with an etching on the back.
54. Engrave a declaration of love in stone and place it in their garden.
55. Write a poem asking for forgiveness.
56. Find a quote that reflects how you feel.
57. Play apology songs under their window for all the world to hear.
58. Dedicate a song to them on the radio.
59. Better yet, sing the apology at a packed karaoke night.
60. Apologize to them in front of the entire restaurant.
61. Make an apology video to play for them.
62. Offer to spend the rest of your life making up for it.
63. Apologize by taking that next step in your relationship.
64. Give them a cute “List of 100 reasons I’m a dumbass.”
65. Compile several apology songs on a CD and send it with a card.
66. Put your apology in a bottle and throw it out to sea.
67. Make a custom fortune cookie with an “I’m sorry” message.
68. Apologize with tickets to that event you hate.
69. Bake a pizza and spell out “I’m sorry” with pepperoni.
70. Make a photo album of happy memories and finish the last page with your “I’m sorry” note.
71. Have a bouquet of edible flowers delivered with your note.
72. Shout it from the rooftops.
73. Do something unique enough to make the national news.
74. Give them a stuffed animal with a voice recorder inside, where you have said “I’m sorry” in as many ways as you can think of to say it.
75. Learn how to say “I’m sorry” in a dozen different languages.
76. Write “I’m sorry” in glow-in-the-dark stars on their ceiling.
77. Give them a romantic book with an “I apologize” bookmark.
78. Take a hit in the wallet by draping them with apology diamonds.
79. Go to church and ask for forgiveness from the congregation.
80. Write out your apology in perfect calligraphy and frame it for them.
81. Give them fantastic make-up sex.
82. Offer a deep back massage and ask for nothing in return.
83. Take photos of you looking sad and sorry.
84. Send them an apology every day until they forgive you.
85. Invite her to slap the hell out of you for being such a jerk.
86. Send him out on a night with the boys to vent and get over what you did.
87. Hang an “I’m sorry” banner over a bridge where they will see it.
88. Spell it out with Christmas lights on the lawn.
89. Send one flower every day for a month.
90. Slip chocolates and a love note into her drawer at work.
91. Put an apology letter behind the visor of his truck.
92. Write it on the shower wall in washable colored soaps.
93. Pen it on the mirror with your lipstick.
94. Ask what they want, and then do it, no questions asked.
95. Joke about how good makeup sex can be, and then have some!
96. Give them a wind chime with the words “I love you” etched on it.
97. Tell them how much they matter.
98. Have a portrait of the two of you sketched in charcoal by a talented artist.
99. Tattoo a small tear on your body as a reminder never to do that again.
100. Write “I’m sorry” in rose petals on the bedroom floor.
101. Simply tell them how sorry you are, and then talk the whole thing out.
